I don't enjoy Daniel Craig Bond movies. Now, to be fair, I stopped watching Daniel Craig Bond movies after the first two. They might have gotten better. But the whole thing about having no humor at all was like, "OK, I could just read an Ian Fleming novel if you are taking away the fun parts."
Not to take anything away from Daniel Craig as an actor but I like the cheesy Bonds which was...well, all of them before Casino Royale.
I'm not saying Laser Mission is on par with a Bond film. It is objectively a not very good movie but I watched Julie and Jack and Replica in the same week, so I'm being charitable.
I mean, imagine if James Ngyuen tried to make a Bond flick. That would be a thousand times worse than Laser Mission.
Imagine the action sequences in a Bond movie being like the car crash in replica. (Actually, I would watch the Rohauer* out of that.)
But Laser Mission is just mediocre. It has the elements. Brandon Lee does his best, they have some not really great joke lines but at least they attempted. You have wacky side characters like that military couple and Grandpa Borgnine.
And the girl in Laser Mission is AWESOME. I'm not a big fan of the 80s perm and I'm not even talking about her bod. She has a really cute face and she is resourceful and does whatever is passing for humor in this movie. It looks like the actress, Debbie A. Monahan did go on to a career after this. She only acted in a couple more movies but she went on to be a casting director.
As for Brandon Lee, well, I really like his dad but other than the Crow, this is the only thing I've seen him in. I don't really remember much of the Crow actually but my friends and I got trapped in a basement one time with people listening to the Crow soundtrack. (I don't even remember much of that but I think The Cure was on it.) I think Brandon does an OK job. None of the quips they give him are very good but if you gave him some good ones, I'm sure he'd do fine with them.
Much like your average Bond movie, there is weirdly no blood. I am a big fan of fake blood (I love me some H.G Lewis!) but I am used to the fact that Bond movies rarely have blood. Not even squibs.
The real problem is that there are no lasers. I think that is the real thing that makes it a "bad" movie. Other than that it's a perfectly serviceable B movie. There were worse Bond rip offs on MST3K like that one with Bart Fargo.
Now, once again, if you didn't like this movie, just imagine what it would be like if it was made by James Nguyen.
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Not to take anything away from Daniel Craig as an actor but I like the cheesy Bonds which was...well, all of them before Casino Royale.
I'm not saying Laser Mission is on par with a Bond film. It is objectively a not very good movie but I watched Julie and Jack and Replica in the same week, so I'm being charitable.
I mean, imagine if James Ngyuen tried to make a Bond flick. That would be a thousand times worse than Laser Mission.
Imagine the action sequences in a Bond movie being like the car crash in replica. (Actually, I would watch the Rohauer* out of that.)
But Laser Mission is just mediocre. It has the elements. Brandon Lee does his best, they have some not really great joke lines but at least they attempted. You have wacky side characters like that military couple and Grandpa Borgnine.
And the girl in Laser Mission is AWESOME. I'm not a big fan of the 80s perm and I'm not even talking about her bod. She has a really cute face and she is resourceful and does whatever is passing for humor in this movie. It looks like the actress, Debbie A. Monahan did go on to a career after this. She only acted in a couple more movies but she went on to be a casting director.
As for Brandon Lee, well, I really like his dad but other than the Crow, this is the only thing I've seen him in. I don't really remember much of the Crow actually but my friends and I got trapped in a basement one time with people listening to the Crow soundtrack. (I don't even remember much of that but I think The Cure was on it.) I think Brandon does an OK job. None of the quips they give him are very good but if you gave him some good ones, I'm sure he'd do fine with them.
Much like your average Bond movie, there is weirdly no blood. I am a big fan of fake blood (I love me some H.G Lewis!) but I am used to the fact that Bond movies rarely have blood. Not even squibs.
The real problem is that there are no lasers. I think that is the real thing that makes it a "bad" movie. Other than that it's a perfectly serviceable B movie. There were worse Bond rip offs on MST3K like that one with Bart Fargo.
Now, once again, if you didn't like this movie, just imagine what it would be like if it was made by James Nguyen.
Upvote17Downvote11commentsSha
statistics: Posted by nmoose — 3:25 PM - 1 day ago — Replies 1 — Views 212